Father John E. McGinn, Rector

Saint John’s Episcopal Church

Sandwich, Massachusetts  02563

 

June 17, 2007, Father’s Day                                                         Pentecost 3

 

This sermon is taken from Galatians, chapter 2, verses 15-21.

 

First of all, I want to welcome you all this morning on this Father’s Day for 2007.  I want to begin by saying it is not easy being a father.  I heard about a man who said he was warned that as his three daughters became old enough to date, he’d disapprove every man who took them out. When the time came though, he was pleased that this prediction was wrong.  Each boy was pleasant and well-mannered.  In talking to one of his daughters one day, he said that he liked all the young men she and her sisters brought home.  “You know, Dad,” she replied, “we don’t show you everybody.”  Probably not.  I probably didn’t see all of my daughter’s friends.

 

I want to focus your attention this morning on the Epistle;  the twentieth verse of the second chapter of  Paul’s letter to the Galatians that I just read: Paul writes: “I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.  The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me.”

 

Here I think is the ultimate secret of being a good dad, and a good mom, and a good grandparent, and a good son, and a good daughter, and a good friend.  Ultimately, it is the secret of being a good follower of the man from Nazareth.  “I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” 

 

Now what does Paul mean when he says that he has been crucified with Christ?  Certainly, it does not mean that he has been crucified literally with nails in hands and his feet.  No.  What is crucified in Paul is his old way of living:  his pride and his self righteousness, his sense of moral superiority, his disdain for people who did not think as he did and worship as he did.  Paul became a new person.  It is amazing that the Paul who persecuted people because of their religious beliefs, could be the same Paul who wrote first Corinthians thirteen.  “If I speak in the tongues of angels, but have not loved, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol.  If I have to give the prophecy and fathom all ministries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not loved, I am nothing.  If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not loved, I gain nothing.  Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.”

 

Hard to believe that Paul, the persecutor, wrote these words.  Remember that when Paul, or Saul as he was known then, first came to Jerusalem to try to join the disciples, they were afraid of him.  They knew his horrible reputation.  There was nothing loving about the Paul that they had heard about, and that is just the point:  the old Paul was dead.  Now there was a new Paul, fashioned after the character of Christ; loving and forgiving and accepting and caring.  “I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.  The life I live in the body I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me.” That was the testimony of the new Paul.

 

And that is what we all need:  to be crucified with Jesus and to become new persons in Him.   I think it is particularly true of dads.  Have you ever heard of the male ego?  Of course, you have.  It is part of the male character that many men think the world revolves around them.  I am stereotyping here a little bit, but women have egos too.  But part of the socialization of most women includes learning to think of we and not just me.  Not so with many men. 

 

Maybe you heard about the Lamaze class which was full of pregnant women and their husbands.  The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan.  The teacher then announced, “Ladies, exercise is really good for you; walking is especially beneficial.  And, gentlemen, it wouldn’t hurt you to take time to go walking with your wife.”  The room really got quiet.  Finally a man in the middle of the group raised his hand. “Yes?”  replied the teacher.  “It’s all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk?” he asked. 

 

Again, I am stereotyping.  There are many sensitive and caring men in the world.  But it is also true that many men grow up fighting for a place in the sun.  Their first instinct is to be competitive and to look out for number one.  And this causes them to be insular.  If you let others get too close, they can find weaknesses.  In other words, there is much in the classic male makeup that works against being a loving mate and a loving parent.  Many men need to die to their old selves and to be reborn with a new orientation.  In Paul’s own words:  “To be crucified with Christ and to find a new life within.”

 

Of course, this is true of all of us:  men and women, married and single,  parents and grandparents, and those who are living alone; but for those who are in a situation where you are responsible, not only for the physical needs of others, but also their emotional and spiritual needs as well.  There is that  special need for Christ-like love; a love more giving than the love we were born with.  

 

One author tells about his father who retired at the age of sixty-four.  The author wanted to by his father something to thank him for his hard work and his sacrifice.  And as he shopped, however, he realized there was nothing he could buy that could thank his father enough.  His father had taught him through his own hard work and faith in God that the greatest gifts come from the heart and not in a store or in the mall.  So that night he sat down, and he wrote a list of thank yous to his father for all that he had done for him.  He left it on the kitchen table for his father to read before that final day at work.

 

And here it is:  It says, “Thank you, Dad, for waking up every morning when it’s still dark outside and going to work while we slept in our warm beds; for wearing that ugly paper tie I made you in the first grade; for teaching me how to pray; for coming to all my Little League games, and for keeping quiet when other fathers wouldn’t.  For loving my mother with all your heart; for teaching me I can never say “please and thank you” too often; for taking me out for ice cream the night I stuck out with a tying run on third base; for giving me a hug when I badly need one; for building that voice inside me that said, “no,” when I was tempted to get in a car after I had been drinking; for giving me life even after you lost a son; for helping me buy my first car; for being a wonderful grandfather; for telling me it’s okay to cry; for being my hero; for being my friend.” 

 

Being a loving father does not come naturally.  It is hard work.  It means ignoring your own needs at times so that you can focus your attention on the needs of others.  Some of us had fathers who were able to do that.  Others of us had fathers who could not.  And part of this new, Christ-like character is the ability to give unconditional love.  And what do I mean by unconditional love?

 

I can say without hesitation that conditional love, that is love that is based on accomplishment, not on conditional acceptance; has damaged many of us.  It is very antithesis of Christ-like love.  Christ-like love says:  I love you for being you; not for your achievements, not for being an honor student, not for being outstanding at sports;  I love you without reservation simply and solely because you are my child.  That is the love we receive from Jesus.  That is the love we seek to transfer to our children.

 

If somehow you never received that kind of unconditional love from your parents, I hope you will receive it today from Jesus.  You don’t have to be a super achiever.  You don’t even have to be a super Christian.  God loves you because you are you.

 

I read a story entitled, “Priceless Scribbles.”  It concerns a father who touched his child’s life in an unexpected way.  A young boy watches his father walk into the living room and he notices his brother, John, began to cower slightly as his father entered.  The older boy sensed that John had done something wrong.  Then he saw from a distance what his brother had done.  The younger boy had opened his father’s brand new hymnal and scribbled all over the first page with a pen.  And staring at their father fearfully, both brothers waited for John’s punishment.  Their father picked up his prize hymnal and looked at it carefully; and then sat down without saying a word.  Books were precious to him.  He was a minister with several academic degrees.  For him, books were knowledge.  And what he did next was remarkable, says the author of the story.  Instead of punishing his brother, instead of scolding or yelling, his father took the pen from the little boy’s hand, and then wrote in the book himself, along side of the scribbles that John had made.  Here’s what the father wrote:  “John’s work: 1959, aged two.  How many times have looked into your beautiful face and into your warm, alert eyes looking up at me, and thanked God for the one who has now scribbled in my new, beautiful hymnal.  You have made the book sacred as have your brother and sister, and so much of my life.” “Wow,” thought the older brother,  “this is punishment?

 

The author of the story, now an adult, goes on to say that hymnal became a treasured family possession; how it was tangible proof that their parents loved them; how it taught the lesson that what really matters is people, not objects; patience, not judgment; and love, not anger.

 

I want to say this morning, that kind of love doesn’t come naturally to many of us.  What many of us need is to be reborn, not in a doctrinal sense, but in a practical one.  We need a new heart; we need new ambitions; we need new emotions; we need to die to our old selves; and to be made new to the love of Jesus.  And that’s true of dads, and that’s true of moms, and that’s true of single men and single women.  St. Paul writes:  “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.”  So may it be with you.

 

Amen

 

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